Thursday, June 25, 2009

Health Update Thursday

This week has been a very rough trial on every aspect of my life: physically, mentally, spiritually, emotionally. The only thing that keeps me going at this point in time is my blog and my business.

  • I can't go to school and even when I try to, I just have to stop because it's to stressful on me.
  • Most of my friends have lives of their own and even when they have spare time they don't visit anymore.
  • There really is no where to go when I'm feeling well enough because I've been everywhere you can go in Rockford and the surrounding areas.

Maybe this is all because of my mental state. I'm emotional and there is nothing I can do to make it go away. It's that damn roller coaster that I can't stand to be on. I feel every emotion you can possibly think of and then some in the span of 20 minutes and it's like it's on repeat. I don't mind so much the emotions, but what I mind is how rapidly I change moods. No one knows how I'm going to be feeling the next time they talk to me and I think it may scare some of them away.

I also feel bad that I haven't talked to much of anyone in the past few weeks. It's just too hard to talk to my friends or be around them anymore because I'm so emotionally unstable and I don't want to scare them, hurt them(which is a good possibility), say something that I'll regret later on, etc etc.

Sorry to be dumping this on everyone but I figure I have a right to a whoa is me post now and again.

Anyway, here is an update on what's going on medically:

  1. I wasn't able to start that new doctor and the hydrogen peroxide IVs last Monday because the doctor missed his flight. The sucky thing about that is he is only open two days a week and now we have to wait until the 29th of June for another appointment.
  2. The guy in Kansas that we have been reading up on and debating on going to is probably a no go. Two weeks down there(which is the minimal amount we would be spending) will cost us 6 to 10 grand that we don't have.
  3. I'm on a homeopathic detox treatment for heavy metals and parasites from the naturopath that I'm seeing that totally kicked my butt last Saturday. The drops I took in water had me on the toilet all day(sorry for the TMI moment) with a bucket in my hand throwing up what little I had in my body. And when I wasn't on the toilet I was writhing on the ground in pain because it felt like my stomach and everything else in the vicinity was being ripped apart and set on fire.
  4. Also Saturday, it was quite hot here-It hit up in the middle to upper 80's and I made the mistake of going to an outdoor holistic health fair at our local natural food store without any sort of protection. So on top of the treatment from hell, I got sun poisoning.
  5. I think 3 and 4 combined was why I became so violently ill. Now I'm a tad bit scared to go out into the sun again O.o
  6. I'm still in search of a good counselor and or psychologist. If your in the Rockford area and know of a decent someone, please let me know!

I think that is about it. I told you there really wasn't a lot that went on this week. Well, there was mentally for me, but there is no way to describe that torture to all of you so I'm just leaving it at what I stated above. Thanks for listening to my rant!

Love and Energies.


Judy said...

lots of hugs to you!

Unknown said...

I'm so sorry you are going through such a hard time right now. I know saying "It will get better" will be of no consolation, but believe me it will. You will be feeling better and out of this funk eventually. Until then, stay strong and don't let it get you down. *Hugs*

Live, Love, Laugh, Write! said...

*HUGS* Don't feel bad about being honest - we all need to dump from time to time! And it sounds like you had a seriously horrible week! I'm thinking of starting trying some cleanse things soon and I'm a bit scared because I'm know the detox process can be horrible >_>