Sunday, May 10, 2009

08' vs. 09'


So Tuesday I went to my sister's senior awards at my old high school. It's insane how my little sister is graduating high school within a week. I know I have only been out a year, but getting to see her graduate and putting together her party is really hitting me in both good and bad ways.

Also what hit me the most was sitting there listening to the principle and assistant principle announce each student, their awards and scholarships, where they were accepted and what they plan to be; Sure I know that most of them are not going to end up being what they announced, not because they can't, but because they probably will change their mind halfway through the schooling. It's just two things.

One, I SHOULD have been there last year. I should have been getting awards and scholarships and hearing the announcement that I was accepted to a certain college and that I was going to be whatever I planned on being. But unfortunately sitting there yesterday made me realize how much was really taken from me.

Two, listening to all those students accomplishments made me feel pretty inadequate. Even though I am sick and know I can't do these things, hearing it all makes me feel like a bum despite the fact that I'm sick.

I guess this pity-party-for-one post is about the fact that I should be out and making my mark on the world. Instead, I've been here for a year unable to do much of anything.

Ah, life and all its strangeness.

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